Hello sweetheart.
Believe it or not, I know EXACTLY what you're going through. This time may be painful for you, but it will pass... if you are willing to confront the doubts and ask those questions you think are forbidden. I tried to ignore them and they never went away until I allowed myself to ask the questions. Many people have gone through what you're going through. Remember that the path to the truth is painful and full of uncertainties. If you wish to go back to faith, certainly do so! But if you find that that doesn't work and you can't go back... you can come talk to me if you want. I've been where you are! Hang in there!