I am not sure where to start...?

I don't even know if I should even post about this but I don't have anyone to really talk to right now. I am doing an extra session with my T on Monday, but that seems so far away.

A month ago I had a friend from out of state come and stay with me. She has multiple medical problems and is on disability. Ultimately she needs an organ transplant, but there are so many other health issues that have to be taken care of first that her Doctors won't even consider it right now.

She also has some MH issues. She has Bi-Polar Disorder and possibly Schizo-affective disorder as well.

She lives in a rat-hole of a place and gets her healthcare through the county services where she lives, but it's crap so she's just getting even sicker. Her and I had had a romantic relationship in the past, and we have been friends for 15 years. I really wanted to help her and we had been talking for a while about her coming to California to visit. I was looking for a roommate so we decided that she would come down on a one month trial basis and we would see how we did living together. I was considering registering with her as Domestic Partners so I could put her on my insurance and she could get much better healthcare that she needs and so she could get out of her rat-hole living situation where she lived.

So, over the last month, things have been real stressful for both of us. She's in a new State, we moved, and she had some habits of living that I was having to remind her to stop doing...on a regular basis. It started out okay, but then she started lying to me. Then, my Cymbalta disappeared from my kitchen, and she takes Cymbalta too. I was concerned that she had taken it, and even asked her if she picked up my meds by mistake, but she denied it. I had to refill it and pay full price as insurance would not cover it. Then she tells me that she had been arrested for shopplifting and tresspassing and had been on probation....and it just went downhill from there.

Last week she was hell bent on buying bedroom furniture from the Salvation Army and she thought that her and I were going to move it all by ourselves, but I told her I didn't want to do that because of my Fibromyalgia and I didn't want to risk injury when I'm the only working and financially supporting the household. She hired two guys from CL to pick up the furniture and move it in.

Fast forward to the past two days. I had come to the decision it just wasn't working out for either of us. We were both making each other miserable, and I didn't think it was fair to either of us to look the other way and continue co-habitating when it wasn't working. Her and I talked and decided that she would fly home this coming Monday, and that the Roommate thing just wasn't going to work. She wrote me this nasty letter today stating that I owed her the money for all the furniture that she bought while she was here, and that I owed her money for the movers that she payed to move it into the house. She was well aware of the difficulties that were taking place in the relationship but she still chose to buy the furniture. I wrote her a letter back and told her I wasn't going to be responsible for that, especially since she had yet to pay her share of the rent which she said she would pay. I wrote her a letter and she came into my room with it stating that I admitted in my letter that I was aware I wasn't happy and that I led her on and that's why I owed her the money. I asked her to show me where I had stated that and I took the letter from her to look at it.....

That's when things got really bad. She grabbed me by my arm and twisted it around my back. She was trying to rip the letter out of my hand. She kept grabbing my wrists and upper arms trying to knock me to the ground and she was also stomping on my feet to try to knock me off balance. I was trying to get my arms free and was trying to push her off of me, but she is heavier than me and it wasn't working. I started to scream for help....but she was on top of me the whole time.

I was finally able to get free and I ran to my room and closed the door and got to my phone. I was able to call 911 and the Sheriff came. They took both our reports. She didn't have a scratch on her. The Sheriff took pictures of my arms and my feet and documented over 25 marks and bruises on my arms and feet. They arrested her for Domestic Violence/Assault and she is in jail tonight and will be arraigned later this month for a Felony.

Now....i'm just one big bruise. I hurt....physically and emotionally. I cried a little earlier, but now I just feel numb. I was really scared because she wouldn't stop hurting me. I really thought she was going to kill me because the look in her eyes was so fierce. She had this look on her face like she wanted to kill me. I was telling her to stop and telling her that if she didn't that I was going to call the police. She just kept coming at me and saying "Go ahead then, call them. Can't get your phone can you?"

I know this is long.....but T on Monday is so far away and I can't call my family with this.....they are so judgmental and not healthy....I feel alone right now. On one hand....it's good that she's no longer in this apartment, but on the other....I don't have anybody.

To top it off, even though I know she's in jail, she still has a key to the apartment and I am still afraid she's going to come back during the night and try and hurt me. It's ridiculous really....how could she do that if she's in jail....but it still scares me.

I do not want her to return here. She is not allowed to return here. Tomorrow I am taking her two suitcases and her things and driving them to the prison and dropping them off. They can be her storage facility...not me. I am getting a restraining order too.

I don't want this to sound like "poor me", but I was wondering if I could have some hugs. I really need some hugs right now. This just sucks.