You may be ready, but God isn't ready......when I realize that, then I realize that my ready isn't God's will & it's time when I need to be more aware of trying to listen. You know the example with the flood & the helicopter.......when we aren't getting our purpose, there is usually a reason......& it's usually because we are rejecting all the life boats that we have been sent & not acknowledging that they are from God or they aren't what WE want. I know that PTSD can definitely keep our view from seeing what God wants for us......we definitely know who uses things like that & provides us with all our rationalization to keep us from seeing.

When that happens in our life, we need to fight the effects that are keeping us from hearing the purpose that God keeps sending us but we keep rejecting with the rational that he isn't telling us anything.

God knows you can get yourself through this difficult time & hopefully break the pattern that PTSD has created for you. It doesn't mean that the physical issues will go away, but they will no longer be the reasons why the life boats & opportunities that are presented are rejected. It's hard work, but since when isn't it hard work to stay where God expects us to stay?

When for so long we don't hear God purpose for us, we need to stop & think about why?...... drowning it with our "I cant's", or our "I don't want to's"....you can guarantee that God is not silent for 25 years.....the problem is usually that God is telling us what we don't want to hear or can't hear ......but which ever it is, it's our job to counter the problem & get back into the relationship that God wants us to have......in many cases using whatever psychological technique that may help or any other help that we can use & a lot of prayer asking for our relationship to return & for the block to be removed. Only with God's help will you find your new purpose in life but you also have to be willing to follow his will for you. It's obvious that going home wasn't his will or he would have taken you 25 years ago. Like I said....PTSD is good at getting us stuck & that is a definite battle that has to be fought in order to go on with the NEW purpose for our life. Keep asking & listening.....God's been talking to you all along, it's just been masked with the PTSD & the disabilities....with his help you will be able to overcome & accept your life as it is now along with finding the new purpose which has come after the PTSD & disabilities.

Keeping you in my