Quote:
Originally Posted by xenabaiche
I'm pretty sure I dissociate. I'm seeing a psychiatrist every week to figure out whats going on with me. But, If I am actually dissociating, it feels like this. I zone out but I'm still concious, I know what I'm doing at the time. I feel all fuzzy and tingly in my head and my whole body. I actually kind of feel like I'm on some weird drugs, like I'm on a trip. It usually happens when I get stressed out, like if I'm in the middle of an argument with my husband. But sometimes it happens out of nowhere. He can tell when it happens too, I talk different, he can look into my eyes and I look almost empty kind of. If I'm in the middle of saying something, I all of a sudden stop, and everything goes blank, I dont remember what we were even talking about or what I was saying. Then when I finally feel normal again, I have an extremely hard time remembering what happened. I'm pretty sure I have dissociated for a month or two at a time!
When I was 16, I went through a very stressful time, I lost my first boyfriend because he went to prison for something he didnt even do and I lost my mind basically. I couldnt handle it. I really loved him. I somehow dont remember quite a few months of our whole relationship, especially towards the end of it. For the past 4 years, I went on a rampage. I dont remember half of it. I ended up getting raped twice, and I was also in an abusive relationship for a year and a half. I cant remember a lot of any of it. Anways, my husband, who actually was the boyfriend who went prison, notices that I'm laways forgetting certain moments, or things I say or do, even recently.
Now I want to hear your stories! Tell me how you feel when you dissociate.  |
what does your treatment providers say about when you feel like this?
the reason I ask is because your profile says you have borderline personality disorder. that disorder sometimes comes with a symptom similar to dissociating. its called Psychosis. if this is part of your borderline personality disorder by way of psychosis having your treatment providers adjust or prescribe medication can fix this problem so that it doesnt keep happening.
your profile also says you have aspergers. aspergers also has symptoms that mimic that of dissociation. with some people with this during social situations and other times, like talking with family and friends if the conversation becomes stressful they have sort of a brain freeze where they dont know what to say, forget the conversation and get this nobodys home / glassy / spaced out look in their eyes. and they talk in monotone (flat no emotion sounding voice)
just to cover all the bases I would like to suggest you talk with your treatment providers. they can let you know whether whats happening is dissociation or a symptom of your mental disorders or both. people can have dissociation problems with or without any of the known mental disorders.
That said
what does my dissociating feel like? to me it feels like I am sinking into and becoming part of the wall, bed, floor, chair what ever object that happens to be around me at the time I dissociate.
