Warning: Long post...

Thanks to all of you for your responses. I know what I have to do intellectually (one step at a time, baby steps, etc.) but I'm so pooped out psychologically. I have "re-invented" myself before but each time the task seems more challenging and more demanding. And it seems to take longer. Discouraging... I know I can't give up and just have to take it easy. And I really can't be sitting on "the pity pot". Even though I have a mental illness I have a few relatively minor physical problems, unlike others. I am not always grateful but I try to be. My psychologist pointed out that I have a wonderful support system in place, I just have to be proactive and use it.

I have a 24 y.o. daughter living 8 hrs. away who has a myriad of problems with finances, children, husband, employment, housing, transportation, health insurance, etc. Her situation is "critical" and she is calling me on a daily basis hysterical and seeking support and I am wrung out about that situation as well. It's not the 1st time. I can't offer solutions, (even though I drive myself batty trying to find them), only support, and it's difficult being supportive when it upsets me and makes me angry that her own poor decisions have resulted in her predicaments. She had every advantage I could provide (I mean a good education, stable environment, love, activities, etc.) and a beautiful life and she married a drug addict (now in his 2nd rehab) and has 2 children (2 yrs. and 6 mos.) both unplanned pregnancies. Throughout my life these situations with my daughter have been problematic. I did my best to raise her (was divorced when she was 2) as a single parent. Her biological father was the "Disneyland Dad" who would sweep in periodically but never lived close enough to be involved in the daily routine of raising her. Now he has washed his hands of her (again) and has basically disowned her. And he lives in the same city as her, just miles away. He has a "new life" with his son and wife. Doesn't want to be bothered...

Through the years I always find my daughter to be the central theme in my therapy sessions. Our relationship, (which has had it's share of estrangements), the stress I feel from her situation(s), the sadness I feel about the struggles and failures along the way. It has been pointed out to me that she is a main source of stress for me. I am currently working (in therapy) on "maintaining boundaries" but what to do when it is your only (adult) child and there are 2 innocent grandchildren involved in this mess? My husband (who was her step-father from age 5) is at the end of his rope with this. He is supportive of me and has truly empathized with her (providing financial help when needed) but he can't take watching me become distraught when I'm trying to recover from depression, etc.

Sorry for the long post. I don't expect responses. Just had to vent and take a deep breath and get ready to face tomorrow.