tree, I think your comments are valid. I didn't realize I missed out on the nurturing until I was in therapy. But you're right. If I would have told my mother, I'd have gotten reassurance. It wasn't like she was afraid of her shadow! She would have made me feel safer. I don't remember talking about my feelings at all! That's weird! I don't think I EVER had a conversation like you had with your son!
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I wonder if your desire to be with T so much has to do with an unmet need to just be able to say whatever you need to say without worrying that the "caretaker" won't be able to handle it? In a way, by not telling things to your mom, you were taking care of HER. Now T is taking care of YOU.
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That seems to fit though I didn't realize I was doing that as a child and teenager. I know that one reason I like therapy so much is that I can talk about everything on my mind. I can't seem to get enough of doing that.
Maybe that's why I go on and on in the forum, too. I am making up for not talking about what really mattered to me in the past years. It seems like a real need to do that, to have a T or other people who listen to my feelings and can handle them, and accept me. It's becoming a little clearer. I always said our forum was sometimes better than therapy!
