It does not sound like you have anything else in your life. Yes, you stopped for the baby/because you were pregnant but what is wrong with that? You decided to stop and it was for you -- you deemed the baby important enough to you to stop. You need to find or decide to create other things of importance to you. If you truly love your husband, make your and his health a priority and be the "strong" one and work on denying the two of you the immediate pleasure. You say you have helped one another? Well, help him and yourself now by leading the two of you out of this hell?