At the moment I really cannot find a way to leave. I need to find a way to make it tolerable until I can afford to leave (even though he makes no money it's things like deposits etc I don't have to rent anywhere else, he'd had to move out without me anyway. It's a lot of upset and disruption for my children when he could just go).
So in the meantime I'd like to understand why..he's had years and years of my life.