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Originally Posted by Anika
(((djmart))) I am sorry you and your sister went through that. That must have been very scary.
I spent the rest of the day in tears, I guess maybe there was still a little mourning to do. I'm sure no matter how much I forgive and try to let go these things will suface from time to time. Always seems to be when I am not expecting it. I spent the day and evening on my couch. I've cried a lot my eyes are sore. But I've told myself I will feel these feelings today and then put them away tomorrow. I really don't want this to pull me off track.
Sheba, yes I think we all need someone older to look to for guidance. That's one thing I haven't had yet. I have no aunts in unckles, cousins or grandparents and my father passed away. I haven't found any parental figure yet and I think that's what I'm sorely missing.
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It will surface from time to time as you said...it just does. I think we are triggered by them, sometimes when we least expect it. I know I've thought "oh, I know how she is...self absorbed, etc.", however I still have thought well if I "really" need her she'll do her best and when that doesn't happen...it hurts and makes me angry.
I like you have no parental figures (No aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents). My neighbor is older and we have a sort of connection, however I hate to tell her my woes. In 09' when I downed all my pills my husband called her to see if I was in the home, since I was MIA. She used her house key we gave her for emergencies and found me in a coma. So, I've already put her through a lot!
For me personally, when my mom upsets me I have to avoid her for awhile and it helps me gain prospective on the situation.... She knows not what she does!