Things have been rocky between my husband and me lately. He's under a lot of stress and tends to withdraw from everyone. Some days I only get to be around him for maybe 3 hours; the rest of the time he's sleeping or holed up in the bedroom.

This wouldn't be so difficult for us if I didn't have so much anxiety about it. I know I have insecure attachment issues, but I feel sure that my real problem is separation anxiety. I become very panicky, angry, and often cry when one of these bad moods comes around. I feel guilty about that, despite not being able to help those feelings. I know that I put more strain on him when I get upset while he's trying to leave. I'm so sorry about that. I just feel so abandoned and so angry. I miss him and need to be near him, seeing him laugh and joke around. I know it's all my fault though.

Typically, he wakes up in a decent mood (always so tired though, he sleeps 12+ hours a day), we enjoy each others company for an hour or so, and then he runs off to take a shower. Later during the day, his whole "self" changes. Suddenly, he doesn't talk, unless I ask him something, and his tone of voice is just flat. We sit in silence for hours because, according to him, he's trying to at least give me that instead of running off right away to be alone, because "you're so sensitive" and he doesn't want to hurt my feelings. Eventually, he says he wants to be alone for 5 or so hours, but even when that time has passed, he's still in a bad mood and doesn't talk to me.

I know something is wrong, but when I ask about it, it's always 'nothing's wrong'. I feel like I have to beat it out of him. "Is it a headache? Is it that you're tired? Are you stressed?" and then, "It's nothing. I'm fine." He says he often has trouble identifying his feelings but I think a lot of it is just that he doesn't like to talk about it. He was a lot worse when we first met, but he's still a bit tight-lipped about it when he's in a bad mood.

If he could just communicate better, it'd help me out a lot, so I don't sit there for hours wondering if he wants to leave me or hates me. Instead of 'nothing's wrong', if he could just say, "I'm in a bad mood," or "I have a headache and don't feel like talking." Anything but 'I'm fine' when we both know he's not. We've discussed communicating better, but I don't know if it'll really work or not.

I'm seeing a new therapist later this month, but until then, I have to deal with this on my own. What can I do to make things better for both of us? How can I not freak out when he's in one of his bad moods? Or rather... how can I stop being so clingy, needy, and get rid of these feelings of abandonment? Any input would be greatly appreciated.