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Oct 13, 2011, 02:34 AM
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Member Since: Mar 2009
Location: So Cal
Posts: 3,342
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 I go back to work tomorrow.  It will be my first day back since the assault. I sent a message to my Manager because I had to take a sick day yesterday to get the restraining order so she is aware that I was assaulted.
I'm afraid I'm going to go to work and people are going to be looking at me....like my manager would have told them and they would be looking at me funny all day. I have bruises all over my arms....and I'm embarrassed and afraid that my co-workers will be looking at me all day and that it's going to be awkward. I'm afraid someone is going to be brave enough to ask me what happened.....and I don't want to talk about it.
I'm thinking of wearing a long sleeved shirt under my scrubs.....but it gets so hot in the lab as it is.
I'm dreading work. I'm sure I am just making things worse for me with this anticipatory anxiety, but I don't want people to see me tomorrow. I just want to go to work and be invisible.
Actually, I just want to hide for a while....and going to work is not consistent with hiding. Unfortunately I have no option with that. I must go to work. I can't let this one incident shut me down.....as much as I want to....and as much as it feels safer to do so.
I really just want to sleep...and sleep........and sleep for the next two days.
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