Quote:
Originally Posted by sunrise
stopdog, how long have you been seeing your new therapist? I think it's not long, is it? I would wait a little while before asking about taping. Get to know each other first. Maybe you will be trustworthy and you will not find that she is saying things about your past sessions that don't ring true. So there would be no need to have those tapes. I think asking for tapes right off without giving the relationship and her a chance sets kind of an adversarial tone. Maybe that's too strong a word... I would give it a little while, or until she starts saying things from previous sessions that you don't believe are true.
You mentioned you are "going into terror" with the new T. Have you told her you are scared? Do you know why you are in terror of her?
Good luck.
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I have been seeing her for about 8 months. I think I am trustworthy- it is the t I am worried about. I have told her about being irrationally terrified of her. She says it makes sense to her. I have no idea why except it is like she will humiliate me or kill me (I know she will not actually kill me). It would be not bad for me to hear the tape and find out I am wrong. That way I would not become as angry and frustrated. I am looking at it as not adversarial, but reassuring, sort of like, well I did misunderstand - good I can go on with my life without worrying about why I am paying some stranger to be abusive or just dead flat wrong . Even if I am right, it is reassuring and I would not (I think) get as upset because I would have a way of proving it. With that proof in hand, I would be more willing to believe the t's denial was a memory lapse rather than a lie or an attempt to avoid taking responsibility for what t did, because with the proof the t could not continue to deny it occurred and blame me for being upset without cause.