Oh btw i did sit the kitty as i typed he's in his basket i made up for him. He's a feral kitten so he wants to hide so made him a place comfy to hide . I'm sorry but i go through this rapid cycle of love hate dead and whirl wind of thoughts a lot. I'm gettin tired of it. We are human and my boyfriend was alone for 10 years so he is him and i do love him. He calls me when he knows i'm so upset, he bought the kitten he gave me like 80 bucks for a 30 kitten and i gave back the change sigh. I think this i will print off to t cuz i always tell her my relationship is fine with my boyfriend but in reality i'm tearing apart at times. I feel like doing bad things to me. not good i need to get a grip. I know this last week in Beauflow land has been screaming up and downs, maybe the last two weeks maybe longer and i don't realize it. I've been causing headaches at work too which isn't helping