Venus - This is very true. I know that a lot of young people where I live really do not know what they want. There are a lot of young adults drifting aimlessly here. I figure one can not do that forever and at some point, one has to choose a direction and go somewhere. If you don’t like it, you can always use it to fund the pursuit of that dream you realized later. I’m not actually doing exactly what I wanted in life. But I still feel proud of it and find it to be worthwhile. And I’m driven on.

I absolutely hate getting the kinds of responses which you got from your university. In fact, I’ve noted that the program I’ve chosen is one of the worst for the kind of problems I have. It involves a lot of high stress social interaction. And ya know what? I think in some ways I actually improve from challenging myself. Hell, I’m not half as afraid to pick up a phone as I used to be. I notice people who focus completely on self-improvement often seem to be chasing their tails and never getting anywhere. It helps to focus outward. To find goals outside of oneself and pursue them.

Yes, I think you hit the nail on the head regarding finding balance. It’s just that for people with mental health problems, there is going to be a whole lot more of doing uncomfortable, difficult, and even painful things in order to accomplish major goals. Fair, unfair (what is really fair though; as you are fond of mentioning, so many in the world are in far more horrid situations) it still must be done. Hah, I will have to read that dystopian novel though. It sounds about my speed.

Ellie – Yes, that is pretty much what I am doing. After this semester it will only be another year, and I’ve worked a lot on it. My worst issue is with next semester though, since there is a very high chance I’ll make a suicide attempt. No pain, no gain though, right? Hah. We’ll see how things go and I’ll try not to destabilize to that extent again.

- Still interested in hearing from those who have completed one of these routes and can offer feedback on how they think their lives have turned out as a result.