I absolutely hate getting the kinds of responses which you got from your university. In fact, I’ve noted that the program I’ve chosen is one of the worst for the kind of problems I have. It involves a lot of high stress social interaction. And ya know what? I think in some ways I actually improve from challenging myself. Hell, I’m not half as afraid to pick up a phone as I used to be. I notice people who focus completely on self-improvement often seem to be chasing their tails and never getting anywhere. It helps to focus outward. To find goals outside of oneself and pursue them.

Yeah, I can fake it pretty well now. I mean, I did take on a project where I took care of 10 foreigners... and none of them suspected I may be social phobic or even some issues... well, some mentioned "crazy" in the feedback form, but they meant it as compliment. If I gave in I would never do this...

So maybe we can push ourselves a bit. Maybe everybody struggles in some way. Maybe many struggle in more ways than they admit.

Yes, I think you hit the nail on the head regarding finding balance. It’s just that for people with mental health problems, there is going to be a whole lot more of doing uncomfortable, difficult, and even painful things in order to accomplish major goals. Fair, unfair (what is really fair though; as you are fond of mentioning, so many in the world are in far more horrid situations) it still must be done. Hah, I will have to read that dystopian novel though. It sounds about my speed.

What is fair? Maybe my quirks help me in some way (hey, I was riding on wave of mania during the project I lead... who cares I crashed when nobody was looking and slept for few days afterwards. I made it great and that is what matters...

Often people like to look through list of great people with MI... Lincoln was bipolar they say. If we accept the fact... would we want him to watch out his stress levels and yadda yadda... probably not, because that would be a loss for the world in the end...


Madis... I think having a purpose in life is the most important part of human experience... I call BS on people saying our jobs and hobbies and other things to do define us... because they totally DO.