Well, there isn't any way I can find to ignore any one thread.

Sleeps I'm trying to help you through this...really. I only quoted some of the things YOU said about T, to let you know I only know what you are telling us, and plus to remind you that you did say he crossed the boundaries etc. Also, to show that you are "all over the place" with your feelings, an understandable result, imo.

How long has it been now, since you've had any contact with T, and what are the prospects of continuing therapy in some form or fashion with him or anyone?