I've known for a while that you can turn corners in therapy and see things you've never seen before or see things from a completely new angle. But I never imagined I'd come across the kind of shocker I encountered with T yesterday. I'm still trying to absorb it. To understand it. To change everything that needs to be changed because of it. Because of it a lot of anxiety just went away, like soapy water down the bathtub drain when you're finished with your bath. I don't know if I believe or trust that yet.

I can't tell you yet what it was because I don't know enough about the consequences. And I'm still pinching myself to see if it's real. I guess T and I will be talking about this new development for a while. You people out there may well have guessed this before, or known it or assumed it from many of my posts. It's just something I've blinded myself to all my life from the very beginning. Nothing weird and wacky, just something sad and personal.

The really wild aspect is not the truth of the thing, it's the fact that I've spent all my life and a heck of a lot of energy blinding myself to this reality. The mind is indeed wondrous. I guess we all get that feeling over and over. I'll keep you posted.