I feel for you, Dreamy. I got out of the hospital about a week ago. I had a total meltdown. I didn't stop crying for days. The stress of having a job, a house, a husband, a dog... sometimes things get out of control. I am doing a lot better now. I think i was in a state of depression for over a year. As long as you are getting good help you will find answers. I got a new pdoc and T and it was the smartest thing i've done in awhile. Keep your options open.