All that travel sounds good on paper, but it's super disruptive to the everyday life. If you do the math, that's traveling more than a week every month, which means I'm constantly preparing for or recovering from travel, and not getting as much solid work done in between.

So far so good on avoiding dangerous stuff (other than drinking). Only minor overspending, and usually "forgivable" travel-related expenses. But on one trip earlier this year, I definitely overspent and also came home with (another) new tattoo. Fortunately, it's an awesome tattoo, so I can't regret that too much!

I worry more about the potential consequences of being a little too intense in social settings, e.g., talking way too much with the filter off. I don't want to shoot myself in the foot professionally. For example, it's likely that I'll get a chance to negotiate the postdoc I really want on this trip, assuming I can keep my **** together. And my mental clarity (while I might think it's stellar) really drops when I'm getting only 2 hours of sleep a night, which is not great if you're supposed to be on point for professional interactions.

And of course, when I get home and return to some level of stability, it's not back to normal. There's usually a mercifully brief spell of depression to struggle out of as well. Except that I'm on track for an annual bout of depression that tends to be longer and nastier anyway, so the rebound from hypomania could be a lot harder to pull out of.

I'm two time zones away from home this week, and my sleep is already messed up on day one because of an early flight. I actually have to get to bed within the next hour or I'm in for an episode for sure - 2 short nights in a row gets me all wound up!