Everything doesnt seem as stable ground as it has the last week or so.

I went out for the first time in three weeks today. Well, id been to the store once before but thats just at the end of my small street.

Today I went to the Employment Insurance Office.

It took me this long to work up the courage to go out in public, and I hated every minute of it. The second i left the house I felt like throwing up, was shaking, heart pounding etc.

All the miserable way there and all the miserable way back.

Things have been slipping for me the last couple of days. I think the pit is coming for me, I dunno.

I find myself really often trapped in thought cycles too..

One OCD type thing I do is get stuck on words in my head(our head? I feel like im not recognizing the others enough in this, i suppose it does affect them too) and when I get stuck on a word, ill say it in my head a bunch of times and then define it in my head, and use it in a sentance? Weird stuff.

like thinking cat - A feline animal that is domesticated. Can also mean a feline creature in the wild.
Cat is a noun.

Cat.

The girl sat and stroked her cat, or , the cat played lazily with the string.

And i will get caught in word after word, its like a domino effect.

i dunno. I just feel like something is around the corner and it is inevitable I know, but DAMMIT just when I was doing better.

Rawr.