First & foremost you need to take care of your self. The girl friend isn't able to take care of these issues, & can be quite overwhelmed by them. That would be like expecting your dentist to do brain surgery. You need experts in the field. Also alcohol causes magnification of depression & increases the perception of these problems. It's like poring gas on a fire. Structure, good solid psych care, sobriety, support groups, can set you on the road to recovery. It's hard work; but your worth it. Thank you for serving our country. We had many soldiers in re-hab suffering from similar symptoms you have described. A safe nurturing, structured environment with time to heal. Oceans of love to you.