Well, I went. Had another embarrassing interaction in the lobby where once again I made myself look like an incompetent fool and also made the receptionist have to do more work.

My therapist and I didn't connect. That's it, really. The summary of the session. She asked me how I was and we talked about work. She asked what I came in to talk about and we talked about work some more. She gave me some strategies to help me get to sleep in the evenings and told me I seemed like I was handling a lot of things well.

At the very end of the session, she asked if I was coming back to therapy. I paused then said I would after a trip coming up. I thought that'd be 3 weeks. I just noticed it's four.

I lied to her a lot during the session about how I'm doing okay. She wasn't very present either. My conclusion: she doesn't care about me and I don't deserve help. The other option: she doesn't care about me and there's just a rift between us that we will never be able to cross.

Why would she asks what seems like such a significant question right at the end of a session?