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Old Oct 21, 2011, 10:01 AM
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unaluna unaluna is online now
Elder Harridan x-hankster
 
Member Since: Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 42,228
Quote:
Originally Posted by OneRedRose View Post
its was very odd but good, I may have to tell her, see what she says about it, we were basically talking about what she meant by being kind to youself, and so she told me what she does she said a few things but this was the thing that really got the ball rolling in my head, she said "and when the critical voice pops up in my head, I stop and I say 'thank you for your contribution, but I will be continuing as I was'" and in that moment I realised that its not just us that have the critical voice, T's struggle with it too, they are not perfect, they have been depressed and self critical themselves. and then I felt sorry for her and wondered why she would be self critical and I started feeling empathy. I think T's need to see that sometimes they should show their imperfections as it offers a kind of life line in a way, that someone that seems so well rounded can also struggle? if that makes sense, ive only just really woken up haha!.
My experience was so similar! Maybe a new thread, Is your T human? I asked T what went wrong in your recent relationship(s), generally speaking (so when WE got married, I could avoid these problems, of course!). He said he would get despondent and the women then felt powerless. I was like, whoa. Or woe. You do kinda feel, then why am I bothering him with MY problems, if HE'S depressed? I wouldn't say we cross boundaries, as much as we TOY with them in the interest of the therapy. A life line is a good way to put it, it is SO POWERFUL when something like this happens, and it seems to come fRom out of the blue and pull you in another direction. Thanks.