That's basically it, I think Wendy. It doesn't feel "real", just surface cr*p, like I told my T.

He honestly believes that this therapy will work - he also told me that he couldn't and wouldn't want to, hide anything from me. Like he said, he never mentioned DBT to me or anything of what he was trying..........I investigated and discovered it for myself. He believes that I am "too intelligent" to try to cover things up with me - that I would see through him immediately.

All I know is that today my other pdoc came up with a new med - Depakote - and I'm taking 500mg per day for a week, then boosting it up to 750. The last few days have been so miserable and stressful for me............it really stretched my limits.

I called him today and said that he needed to "fix" things between us - he wouldn't budge though on his ultimatem: I either have to accept the idea of this stuff and try, or not see him anymore. He admitted that he is challenging me here, but he wants to help me. [sigh] I was in tears, so upset over the thought of not talking to him anymore, but I did tell him that I resented being forced into doing something I don't like.