ok hun, it doesnt sound like your "gay" at all. I know its hard to find someone. Like I'm gay and havent had a relationship in a long time with a guy. Keep looking and something will come your way, either through your friends or at a party or something like that. Now for that female part, I agree with what your saying, yes they are role models to you, from what you said, I see nothing sexual towards females at all. no attraction but if you do fancy females, by all means, go out and get yourself one. nothing wrong with being "bi" or "gay" you know? dont let people tell you any different. Reason why its hard for me to come out is cus of my high school growing up, people always put me down for being gay but I never told anyone, they just knew. and from that, makes it difficult for me to come out to anyone cus I think everyone is homophobic. Just remember one though. Be yourself and things will come to you.