I'm sorry that you are feeling so badly, Rose. I hope that things get better for you (they will!) and that your doctor can help you.

I wish I knew more of what to say, it sounds like you have a lot of things going on at once, which of course can be quite overwhelming.

Just know that there are people here who do understand, and want to listen. We may not always know how to help or what to say, but we are here. Take extra good care of yourself and remember that things will get better even if it doesn't seem like it right now.

Love and Best Wishes,
Sujin