Well said, farmergirl. It takes some courage and you have to learn to set aside some pride/ego but it's much easier to say "I'm feeling upset/sad/angry etc... right now. Can you put down what you're doing and talk to me for a bit?"

I had to learn how to do it. I have to say to my bf "will you please close your laptop and listen to me?" because he is not a mind reader. And putting that kind of pressure on your bf (it makes it sound like it is his fault if you hurt yourself) isn't fair to him. Then that almost forces him to become manipulative just to keep you safe (i.e. if you do then you don't love him).