Quote:
Originally Posted by peaches100
I have a very frank question to ask. I apologize if this triggers anybody.
I've noticed that some persons with SA in their past have a part of themselves that wants to re-create a repetition of that trauma. Not in real life, but in the confines of their mind. They engage in mental reinactments of what happened, and respond in ways that bring great shame.
Why would this happen? What would cause a victim of SA to want to imagine being hurt in that way again and again? And why would they respond to it in ways that make them feel such shame? It doesn't make sense to me.
Can anybody shed some light?
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Usually repetition compulsion, as I understand it, is behavioral and not confined to the survivor's own mind. So I'm having trouble imagining what you're talking about, maybe you could give an example?
The basic idea as it applies to behavior is that survivors may sometimes engage in activities/attach to people that place them at great risk. For example, a survivor who was raped may start walking alone late at night, and feel compulsive about doing it. A therapist would explain this as she's getting something out of doing this and essentially not being raped. For her, she's trying to break the connection between doing "X" and having the terrible outcome, being assaulted. It is as if she is trying to make the rape she experienced turn out differently, by "playing with fire" and not being burned.
So even though I can't really get my head around what you are talking about, it might be that this applies to repetitions inside one's head. Perhaps there is a trying to make it different aspect to this to.
Here's a good article about re-enactment (repetition compulsion) by van der Kolk, who is the Trauma Man.
Anne
http://www.cirp.org/library/psych/vanderkolk/