Anika, I'm sorry I'm getting in on this late. I think I'm caught up, tho, & this decision to "bow out" of what you can sounds like a wise one. Too much is piled up here.

I think it shows growth & strength on your part to know when to say "This far but no farther." Pushing ourselves past the breaking point is the sick way of doing things. Knowing your breaking point & choosing ahead of time not to go there? WoW. Break thru.

These seem like tremendously healthy instincts, Anika. How does it feel to you?