OK yeah my T is the best! He used a marble to focus with, palm, roll, all that... and worked we me by giving (hypnotic) suggestions/ meditation years ago...so now all I have to do sometimes is THINK about having a marble in my pocket or hand, and my brain calms me down. Go figure

Sigh. The assessment won't happen this week. The person is out of town and hasn't even returned my T's call back.

One of my coping thoughts coming up now is that they aren't really going to do this assessment...they were only going through the motions because of the pre trial hearing... and it will cost them big money to do the assessment (paying the ppl) and then to follow through with the findings (makes it "real" to the system, judge, you know?)

Nah, they are going through the motions. If they offer up something less without the assessment, they won't have to follow through with that either. There have been many times they put me through this kind of stress and for nothing.

If it isn't next Friday, then it won't be till the end of May. I'm really being affected by this stress...the mind can't seem to assimilate it all.