Hi all,

I am a 25 year old female who was diagnosed with Bipolar I disorder last September....I was in denial for about 6 months at least. I have always struggled with depression and anxiety but had never really had a full blown manic episode until my military doctor put me on zoloft for the depression and it sent me on a rocket ship to mania. Looking back I had experienced low levels of mania before this but never had I felt something so intense as I did when the anti depressants started. I didn't know what was wrong with me. I didn't sleep for 6 days or eat. I couldn't stop talking to anyone that would listen, strangers even lol I spent a ridiculous amount of money and got two tattoos that I still regret to this day. Now that its really set in that this isn't going away and I have experienced the manic part twice since getting out of the military and being on my Bipolar meds I know its real and I have to face it. I am lucky that I get money from the VA and medication to help me survive and am very grateful for that. The area I have the most problem with is social situations. I got unengaged last year to my fiance that I had been with for 4 years. Our relationship was tumultous (sp?) to say the least and now I know why. I finally started dating someone new only to have it end 4 months later because of my "issues". I have gone through several "besties" since high school, being really close to them for a short time and it always fizzling out. I am attempting school finally because I can't live on disablity and not do anything...it is making things worse. But besides going to school I rarely leave my apartment and have been rather depressed lately. I am trying to be optimistic and well things really can only go up from here ... Thanks for reading.