gma, you have a good point, and honestly, it could be very true. When this all started, I didn't know what it was, or what to label it was. I felt something, that I had never even seen in my life, and didn't know what to do, and I started reading. Obviously the wrong thing, and ever since then I've labeled it as things related to depression. It is possible, but I don't know if it is possible to completely relabel everything I know. Or if it will work.

The only issue with a medical check-up is the fact that they could find si marks on me in interesting places, and I'm afraid of what they would say, or if they would find an infection due to something I have done. In the past few months I have found out that I am Vitamin D deficiant and that seems to help the most with feeling better, but not completely. I just want to keep all of the si away from those around me. I'm scared to even call for a medical check-up.