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(JD) · Oct 26, 2011, 09:40 AM

(((O E )))) You have to schedule and work at taking a break. Why do you think I play all those games in the arcade here? It forces me to NOT think about all the bad things in my life, all the miserable injustices that have occurred "to" me in the past that do me no good revisiting.

I'm glad your T asked if he was helping you.

Quote:

Yesterday in therapy my therapist asked me if he was helping me and he wanted me to think about how he could help make a change.

Until you reach that point where you don't want to go in and rant and rant about all that's going on but begin to work on HOW it's affecting you and HOW to change how it's affecting you, HOW you are reacting and HOW T can help you learn to RESPOND instead (not a knee jerk automatic reaction that is normal for PTSD, but a habitual calm, active response that attacks the problem level-headedly...) well you won't heal. (Wow that was too long of a sentence!)

You need to find what you do need from T. I often tell my T... ok I need you to .... when I find I keep doing or saying or ruminating over something and need to get out of that rut. You might begin (if you're ready) to tell T... I need you to limit me to 10 minutes of relating the current events, and then help me move to changing how to look at them differently.

For another example, I recently asked my T to help me with looking at Christmas differently than I have since the injury(PTSD)... because for the last several years I haven't even put up decorations because??? Because (T says) I'm bitter. Yep I think that could be it... no one comes to my home, no one sends me or brings me any presents, no cards and maybe a phone call after the fact/day from a brother.

How is that Christmas? But of course, Christmas is Christmas because of what happened 2000 years ago, and I need to remember how to rejoice and be happy JUST because of that fact!!! Regardless of who is in or not in my life... etc. See? T will help me find the joy in Christmas that PTSD has caused me to focus on the negatives and such about what isn't happening during the holidays.

I'd keep your T for now... see if you can give him guidance as to what you really need. Trust me, I know you need to vent some about current activity, yep, or else you feel "no one" really knows what you go through daily. But then, you need to work on WHY you are reacting the way you do, well we know it's PTSD, but to realize the mechanics of it all... T can help with that. Once you begin to see the nuts and bolts of it, you can begin to dismantle the beast.