It makes me angry when people insist that my abuser loves me. At the same time I feel like I'm a hypocrite when it comes to this because at times I feel like I just wish my T would get angry with me because then I wouldn't have to keep waiting for the shoe to drop. That I could trust what she said when she says things if they were mean.

But it made me mad when she said last session that my mom loves me. Like it didn't matter that she abused me. It seems like a cop-out to being able to say that, well because she is your mom, she loves you, and since she loves you, then it is okay she acted the way she did. That you are supposed to just dismiss what she says and ignore it. That it doesn't matter what happened. At what point is the behavior so egregious that you say that the person if they really loved you wouldn't act that way.

It's like, I don't care that she had her own problems, you shouldn't do the things she did to people you love. It seems like everyone just gives her a pass about it. That because it was my mom then it doesn't matter. She still has to love me. Even though she continues with it whenever I see her. I hate this all!