I meant protective in the sense of, as a workman is protective of his tools, as the bond is a tool of psychotherapy. I didn't say "jealous", altho it's interesting that you took that direction. Maybe your wife is jealous and to keep peace in the family, you chose the wife's recommendation rather than T's? Plus bringing T flowers, whatever the rationale - I think there's trouble in River City... that's why T is dismissing HER jealousy. Your wife's jealousy of T's ability to "make" you change makes as much sense as if she were jealous of your dentist's ability to whiten your teeth.

Does this sound like what is going on? Are you caught in the middle of this catfight? If so, I think you are putting yourself there, although I can see how and why it's happening. You can't exactly tell your wife to back off, unless you like sleeping on the couch? Just wondering if this is what is going on.