Ygrec, I'm not sure myself what 'working through' looks like. But I think all the comments about not running away from the feelings and facing them is a good first step. It's our avoidance and our hiding that doesn't allow change or healing. My T constantly tells me to bring my emotions out into the open. Only then can we learn about them and learn how to effectively manage them. It's really really tough and scary too. But I think I'm beginning to see the positive result of grabbing the small bit of courage at my disposal and doing what my T suggests.