All of these tears everyday, why do they come? Why wont the go?
Im so sick of these voices and thoughts also the feeling so low.
Everyday these thoughts of hopelessness and despair,
No happy thoughts anymore, more bad than I can bear.
I give up; I cant keep going all I can think about is suicide,
All day everyday its what I hear; I honestly just want to die.
Every time I hurt myself, every time I slide the blade on my wrist,
I think of how I could just push that blade in deeper, I wouldnt be missed.
I dont think anyone understands, they all pretend that they do,
They don't really get just how bad it is, if only they knew.
I wish I could explain to them just how hard things are for me,
But they wont believe me, so I guess Ill just let it be.
I dont want to do this anymore its all too hard, I cant cope,
I just want to die, I cant do this any more, and I have no hope.

I know I said I wouldn't post again. I guess I was wrong.

I'm really struggling atm.

I got brought to ED 12 hours ago because my cousins partner didn't trust me to stay safe while they were out. probably a good thing since I was planning to OD. now I'm under the mental health act and I just want to go home.

the psych said he'd get my old notes from where I moved from in the morning and we'd go from there.

I had been thinking maybe a longer admission would help because the 24hour ones aren't. but now I'm here the voices are so much worse and want me to leave and do what they say, so I'm not sure I want to stay.

I don't know what I'm looking for I'm just really not coping.