Quote:
Originally Posted by Secretum
Your husband trying to tell you that "you are fine" really annoys me. I hate having my feelings invalidated. Really, who could possibly know more about how you are feeling than you?! If you have the energy, I'd take him aside and discuss this. It really is a major issue; if someone chronically invalidates another persons feelings, it actually is considered emotional abuse. So, you want to gain control over this before it comes to that.
I hope you feel better soon.  |
It annoys me too. I can't remember if he does things like that consistently, but he grew up with a father who did that to his mother. He had a terrible example of what "love" means and how to express it.
I did actually a few minutes ago tell him that I thought he blew me off when i wanted to talk. So we did talk a little bit. I don't feel satisfied. Maybe I ask too much. I need someone who can step in and be strong when I am not, someone who doesn't blow me off and then expect me to feel bad for him because he is tired. When I want to go out and do something or learn something (which doesn't happen much anymore) I feel like I am somewhat under his thumb. More than in a "Gee, I should consider the family before I do this" way, I feel like I can't because he will not approve, like it, support it etc... So I just don't bother.
Another thing that really gets me is that instead of having conversations with me, he has all of his Facebook people to tallk to every night online and I don't know much about what is going on in his life. It's a big deal to get him to talk to me. I guess the bright side is that I get to spend more time on PC.