Ugh Tigergirl. I haven't been in surgery, but I knew someone not too long ago who had to go in for something fairly serious and she was terrified. She knew for months and it loomed over her. Finally one day she came in and said she was ok. I wish I had written down what she said. She basically used dbt skills to get through it, from what I recall.

She used her mindfulness skills to stay in the moment, and she said she used "radical acceptance" (she said she accepted that it was going to happen, and she did everything she needed to do to prepare for it, somehow getting other things out of the way helped lessen her anxiety) to be at peace with herself over the surgery. It turned out it went ok. I'm not sure this will help, but it's all I got. I hope that you find what you need.

I don't know if this will help, but this is some info on dbt mindfulness skills:
http://behavioraltech.org/downloads/...ly_members.pdf