I lose my temper sometimes, or sometimes verbally attack others. For me what is underlying the anger is when I'm upset with someone and feeling deep hurt. When I try to explain what is happening to someone, and they don't understand, or invalidate how I feel, it makes me feel more alienated, and angrier, which in turn makes me feel more out of control and frightened by it.

My ex couldn't understand why I "hated" him, when he was always just happy to see me. And didn't understand what I was so upset about, that there's really nothing worth getting upset over.

I "hated" him because I felt he pushed me away and rejected me. I kept trying to tell him what was going on, but he just would push away more. In the end I felt like I was set up, he telling me that he loved me, then when I told him that I loved him it was "too soon".

Stuff like that.

The more hurt I am, he angrier I get.

I also get angry when I'm frustrated with something, and feel like a "loser who can't do anything right".

A lot of the time I feel like you where I am so upset, but everything is jammed up inside and I don't even know what's going on anymore. Time outs and physical activity to take my mind off it can lower it. If I can distract myself from ruminating about things it can help me feel better.

Though I'd rather be angry than feel deep pain.

I don't know if any of that helped.