lostintermination, I was thinking about what you said about how I am taking back some of the control. I guess before this my only choice (in my mind, anyway) if I wanted to be in control was to quit. I could do things Ts way, or I could quit. This list is maybe me taking a look at the gray areas in between that black and white.

I think the idea of negotiating is a good one, because that is a word that T has been using, too. I was in too much pain, too much denial, resisting reality too much to negotiate the last time I saw her. I couldn't enter into that discussion with her because I was stuck in "But, but...it doesn't have to be this way!".

Ultimately, it does have to be this way if T says it has to be this way. So, yes, I could walk away, or I could enter into the conversation and attempt to get some more of my needs met so I can be stronger before we are really all the way done.