Hey Kureha, I know that thing where people reckon you're doing okay, but really you're hiding a lot. Actually, I think it's a good thing that you hide it, because it shows that you know the difference between what's going on in your head, and what is socially acceptable. While it's not ideal to have to put up a front (life would be so much easier without that extra stress) it's still a sign of mental health, at least I think so. When I'm on the way to poorly I try to hang onto that desire to fit into society, even if I am uncomfortable with sharing everything I'm going through. Sometimes by resisting it, by not letting it bleed into your everyday, it will lessen. I hope that happens with you, that the struggle eases off.