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Old Oct 30, 2011, 04:42 PM
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BrokenNBeautiful BrokenNBeautiful is offline
Mental Wellness Mensch
 
Member Since: Apr 2009
Location: I live with myself. Because that is all I can depend on. Everthing around me changes.
Posts: 3,439
My newest therapist cancelled my appt. today at the last minute, saying she "wasn't feeling too hot".

I have no proof that she was malingering or not, but judging from how I felt during our first interview and her cancelling at such short notice when she was not bedbound disturbed me. She did not sound sick. And she had made the appt. Friday. I wish she had called last night if she wasn't feeling well, unless she was in the ER. And our appt wasn't even a session just another 15 minute interview.

I am learning how to trust my intuition and it's still not much to go on.

I have learned that even with a lot of information to prove otherwise, when you don't feel right about someone, it's usually right.

I told my doctor today (he surprised me; he was on call) that I want to work with someone who is able to, not someone burned out, irritable, stressed, and so overworked that they can't be there for their clients!

He said he felt funny about her behavior and was going to "investigate this".

I have got serious trust issues, but at the same time, I have to honor how I am feeling.

Trust has to be earned by me, the consumer, not coerced.

I feel that this lady can't handle this.

And I can't handle that.

Billi
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The idea of a soul mate is an ILLUSION. In reality, we must learn to be our own best friend/partner. Then if love comes to us, we will already be whole. All that love can do, at that point, is enhance our wholeness!