(((((ArtistDreamer)))))

First welcome to PC. While you may be getting some help with dealing with anxiety and stress, you are probably addressing triggers that you don't realize you have. Crew was giving a chat on DID and you might ask him if he has any good information on it that you can read.

I can understand the kind of knowing but not consciously knowing. But it most likely is some way you protected or shielded yourself from abuse that you had no real way of understanding or escaping in some way. That is really something that you should do with a therapist, preferably a therapist that truely treats and understands it. Otherwise you may run the risk of seeing the missing time and forgetting that you are now safe and are not in that situation now. And I do hope that you realize that whoever abused you was not a person that was well, or probably had some kind of history of abuse as well. Unfortunately this does happen. So it is not only about the abuse that happened to you, it is also understanding the abuser and why they might have been like this.

If you are feeling overwhelmed and hypersensitive right now, you are worried about facing your past, that is normal. But it is really important that you truely understand these situations are in your past, not your fault and going slowly is the key. It really does take time and you must take good care of yourself, and whatever you do, PLEASE, DO NOT BE HARD ON YOURSELF.

Open Eyes