I'll try to make this short cause i know no one likes to read long posts. Ive been struggling with food stuff for the past 6 months (im overwright though and i dont throw up) - heres a list f things i remember i do:
- restrict for a week to two weeks every month (start to lose weight then someone notcies and tells me to stop)
- then i eat a butt load of food and junk food
- i use to write things and codes on my arm to remind myself not to eat
- hide breakfast bars fom my mom and give away my lunch
- eat dinnet with the family but thats it
- if i dont count calories i feel like i will never lose weight
- weigh mtself 2x a day

Theres a few. So a frend of mine has been doing these things too but she is stonger than I am and she lasted longer and now you can see her ribs and feel her hip bones when you hug her (i know this sounds bad but my first thought was 'lucky her') and my mom freaked out. My mom is all concerned saying my friends mom is being blind when my mom doesnt notice when I do the same thing. The only difference is i believe my friend developed an eating disorder because she went so far whereas i dont think I do because im still stinkin overweight. I dont know what to think... I dont kmow why im jealous but i am... And i wish i could be strong like my friend... But i dunno what to do anymore because ive been meetig with a teacher from my school who is holding me accountable...

And i know she would notice and not be happy if I stopped eating again.