EV~ Thanks for your support , I just wish there was an easy way of getting this all out. And theres not gonna be .

Kimmy ~ Ty for the hug. My T doesnt offer email or a persona way of getting a hold of him after hours. The clinic has an emergency phone number to call after hours and I wont use that. I've already expressed so many times why. I dont care to repeat myself again. TY For your kindness.

Wisewoman~ TY for your offer. Its just all too hard right now. Believe me if I could get it out I would. TY for your support

Eva~ TY for the hug and your support. I am trying . Just so hard ...so hard now.

CS~You've made me cry with your reply. I've needed so badly to hear that these past few days. I wish some people were as understanding as you are with what you said. If I could find that key to unlock that last door to get this out I'd open it. I can feel its right there . But its just not coming thru. And I cannot figure out what is stopping it. I've got this list of questions my t gave me and I have gone over and over and over them trying to get it out . It just wont come !! Alls I know is that I feel like I gave permission by getting that test done to feel reviolated again. Does that make sense? And I thought I could do this. I held onto.... omg ... nvm.. Just thank you for helping.