Congrats on holding it together under a very difficult circumstance. Even w/o anxiety issues, having the Grim Reaper tap you on the shoulder would scare anyone! Though I sense you feel like a failure b/c you were so effected by the expeireince, I encourage you to see yourself as a winner that you didn't fall to pieces and you used all your techniques to get through a very scary moment. WTG Canuck.