This is not your fault, hon! The blame is not yours! It must really suck to feel like you're feeling right now, not to be able to work because of severe pain.
I know that you're looking for a job not as physical. Something will turn up! But I know, you want to do what you love to do and what you're trained for.

Time0, you're much more than your job! You're YOU, a person with a huge heart carrying wonderful things inside.

I know you need the money though... but your health has to come first. You coped before when you didn't work, so can't you handle this without you working, just until you find yourself a better job?

Please, don't hate yourself! We all love you!

(((((((((((((((time0))))))))))))))))