I always worry about my son's benefits too. I'd like him to get a job, but honestly I don't think he could hold one at this time. It's more than having odd beliefs. Even though he has high normal intelligence, he can't seem to do a job successfully. I can't figure it out. He just can't follow a series of instructions, or he forgets things easily. Things don't go into memory right, or can't be retrieved from memory. I don't know what it is. I wish I could afford to have him evaluated by an education specialist or something.

Anyway it doesn't feel safe relying on the government for benefits, but I don't know what else we can do. He's got a few jobs over the last couple of years, but he always gets fired quickly. Even when he's "stable."

I think he has a hard time being around other people. Then he gets stressed, and that makes it even harder for him to think clearly. Then he screws something up and gets fired. Ironically he tends to get lower level type jobs because he has little experience. But those are the jobs that tend to be harder for him. Customer service means working with people all day. Stocking at WalMart didn't work, because he has a horrible sense of direction, so he'd get lost in the store. They tried to have him stack boxes on the pallets in the back of the store, but he could never learn to stack them properly, so the boxes would all fall when they tried to lift them with the forklift.

I know that some of the mental health centers around here hire people for peer support. I think he should look into it. He'd be working with people, but it would be different than customer service where you're just a cog processing the customer's order.

Anyway he's meeting with his new voc rehab case manager tomorrow. We had to move him to a different county office because the first office wasn't doing anything for him. They were supposed to buy him a cheap car so he could get to a job or school. The new case manager told him they'd get him a bus pass or something. Very irritating, because clearly she didn't notice that we live 15 miles out in the country; the bus doesn't come anywhere near us. It only runs in town.

I get so mad at these idiots. They'll shove as many pills down his throat as they can get their fool hands on, but when it comes to helping find a job - which is worth 1000 Zyprexa pills as far as his mental health is concerned - they're dragging their heels. He's ready now for a job or school. In fact he's been ready for a couple of months. He's starting to get depressed because he has nothing to do but sit around the house and be alone with his thoughts.