Possible trigger





Does anyone's mind go in this direction?
I told my P-doc about these thoughts I've been having. I'm not sui by any means. I have these generalized thoughts about my mortality. For instance I've been thinking that I really don't have much time left before I die. (I am 54 years old and have had some cardiac issues but I see a cardiologist for testing once a year and it's no big deal). I think about the years of BP issues and how messed up I've been (more on than off) for years. That my "legacy" will be that of a disturbed woman who never found peace in life, only in death. P-doc says these thoughts are an expression of my hopelessness, depression and fatigue. He reassured me that while it is an exhausting task to live with BP and discovering the "correct" combination of meds is a consuming task of trial, error, and adjustment the future will be better and I will experience life in a more positive manner. In other words, there is hope. I'm not obsessed with these thoughts, I just am upset that I have them at all and wish they would go away.